Page 449 (3rd edition...)
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation â€“ some fact of my life â€“ unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could no stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes.
When I first read that, I thought: D'oh! Busted.... That is *exactly* what is wrong with me and my life. and that's what originally brought me to choose sobriety, even though at the tender age of 19, I wasn't even legal to drink! I even went so far as to go through an out-patient (because I volunteered) sobriety program called Edgewood in St. Louis! But when my health problems started, it became very clear I couldn't say no to drugs anymore.
Now, A.A. Has a number of publications, and one of them is called Living Sober and in there is a story about an alcoholic who had to have surgery and was afraid of taking pain pills (like me). A.A. gave me an easy to follow rule: if you're in pain --- take the medication. If you're not in pain --- DON'T take the medication. Easy, right? Problem is.... Pain can become it's own disease and when pain goes chronic, using short-term pain killers is actually what you *don't* want to do...
But back to acceptance. In my many travels, I actually got to meet Dr. Paul O. before he died, and at the time I was dealing with migraines and I was being treated like a drug-seeker, even though I was open about my recovery, had a sponsor, was holding meetings, the works! I told him, I just can't do it.... I can't forgive these doctors for how they've treated me! How do I accept this? I'm being tortured by chronic pain!!!
That's when he said to me: "Acceptance is NOT Approval."
See, if I'm driving down the road, and the car in front of me slams on it's breaks, I may not Approve of them doing that.... But if I don't Accept that they've slammed on the brakes and act Accordingly, I'll end up in a wreck!!!
So it really is a choice, my attitude. But that doesn't mean I have to like the choice I'm given!!! I can accept my illness, but I don't have to try and Enjoy it! Lol
That's just nuts!