Saturday, June 25, 2016

FREE PDF Chin Up! 50 Ways to Make Money While Disabled SCAM

PSA If you find a link to a FREE DOWNLOAD PDF version of my ebook Chin Up! 50 Ways to Make Money While Disabled DO NOT give them any credit card information, EVEN IF they say you will not be charged. There have been several complaints against their over 100 websites and businesses, which also include online games, movies & other clickbait.

It HORRIFIES me to think that anyone is using my ebook to scam people, even more because of who my target audience is! I've tried to make my ebook as inexpensive as possible (most ebooks on disability law start at ten times the asking price), provide it free to folks already enrolled in Kindle Unlimited, allow folks to share the ebook in whole or in part. I don't want anyone to think they have to go through some blackmarket website to get the information they need. Therefore I am running a FREE EBOOK PROMOTION JULY 4, 2016!!

I'm allowed to do this five times through Amazon. This is the first of five, so if you don't catch this one in time, don't worry! There will be another soon. to get your free gcopy, just go to on July 4th and download. Simple!

Spread the word: DO NOT buy the PDF version, it is total clickbait! (As a rule, if they say it's free, but they require a credit card, it's not free.)

Feel free to comment here if you have the ebook and are willing to loan it out to others.

Thursday, March 17, 2016

My Peace

Peace is often the first thing to go with a chronic pain condition. Your body is not at peace. Your mind is not at peace. Even sleep refuses to be a safe haven. So when you do find the right combination of medications that puts the symptoms to bed, the peace that follows can be such a foreign feeling that its stillness roars.

My doctors and I have found that sweet spot, we know exactly where it lives, with a new added bonus: I require even less medication to acheive the same degree of control. The miracle required for improvement turned out to be very simple (and please don't laugh, I know some of you have been saying this for years): I quit smoking. Now I break out in hives if I try to take even one puff. What I didn't realize is how much of a toll fighting off that allergy was having on the rest of me! Now my pain is less, my energy is higher, I'm off the oxygen even at elevation and I'm feeling like a new woman.


This is why I hang on with all my might. This is why I try to be grace under pressure. This is why I try new things and take the risk to travel despite it all. Because only once will it get so awful that there's no coming back. Every time before then is just another trial to go through to reach peace and happiness on the other side. Until it's the last time, time will always change things. It may not change the things I want changed with the promptness in which I want them changed, but that's just my impatience. If I am able to wait long enough, something new will come along for me. And it really helps to keep a good sense of humor in the meantime.

This is why I was so frustrated— because this peace was just outside of reach for so long! We knew the answer. We could see it right in front of us. But a giant chasm of beurocracy had opened up and we just couldn't get there from here at the time. And now that the chasm has be crossed and I've arived, all that frustration and stress is melting from my shoulders. I am in control of my pain, it does not control me. I have the tools I need to tame the beast. I'll never have to doubt my ability to do something. I know I can do it. No longer do I have to cautiously think about each move. Now I can move without thinking, which allows me to concentrate on better things.

The relief from no longer having to worry from moment to moment, "Am I okay? Am I going to be okay?" allows everything else. "Yes, I'm okay, what do you need?" That statement is the difference between an employee and a consumer. Put me on the production side, always. I will be a contributing member of society, with joy. The only thing I might complain about is my commute. Everything is manageable.

Peace of body, peace of mind, peace of life.

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

New Year - New Goals

Apologies for my absence. Life got very real. Things are finally going to be set straight.

I used to have a rule: Never live south of the Mason-Dixon line. And if you know your American History, you know that St. Louis is below that line. Now, I have much love for The Lou and many a fond memory here. But in many ways this place is NOT good for me. Allergies for one. Weather for two. I need a dry climate. I can handle my nerves when it's cold and dry. Mongolia would be perfect for me. St. Louis is hot, humid, and wet. Half this place is reclaimed swampland. Pam + St. Louis = bad.

Add to that the research I compiled while I took my online vacation: it is damn near impossible to get legal pain prescriptions in Missouri. I have talked to multiple patients, I have made my own attempts only to be told the pain clinic makes no prescriptions.... I cannot find treatment here. My father's clients find any drug they need on the streets. They get hundreds of milligrams of methadone a day from the drug programs (often sold at $20 for 75mg). But if you have a legitimate pain problem, you're screwed.

So it's back to the land of sanity, and it's time to make a few changes.
1. I must quit smoking. The nicotine helps the migraines but my lungs are shot. If I'm going to live at 6,000ft, I need as much oxygen as I can get.
2. I must get better at posting here. The hiatus was necessary. I needed a walkabout. But it's time to come home.
3. I need to rent a house. Apartment/condo living is NOT for me. I need my sanctuary in which I can heal when I hurt.
4. Work. This SSDI is not cutting it. Not in this economy.
5. Publish the paperback. It's time.
6. Find my people.

Long term:
7. Financial stability (difficult with a chronic illness, but not impossible with work income)
8. Adopt

I became lost after the "But You Don't Look Sick" messages boards were taken down. It was like someone had come in and burned my village. I don't know where my tribe is anymore. We scattered to the wind and I can see no other villages in the distance. I need to be with my people again. Their support was amazing and got me through so much. I miss it terribly.

I need to shoot for the dream I've had since I was a little girl: I need to adopt. I need to be a foster parent. That's a piece of me I've left unfulfilled for too long. My body can't make children, not without a lot of expensive help. But that doesn't mean I can't be a mom. I will be a mom.

It's time. Happy Year of the Monkey!