Wednesday, June 27, 2012

#NMAM Learning to Self-Care

Talk about who inspires you to keep trying and not give up, despite your Migraines. There's a little girl who lives inside of me, my inner child, and I have to remember her in everything I do. She came to me once in a vision. I was in a level 10 migraine, and there were some pain pills on the counter. I was refusing to take them. I was in the shower, with the water on as hot as I could stand, to counteract the pain of the migraine. My vision went white, and they came to me: an impossibly beautiful version of myself, hand-in-hand with that little girl. And the woman said to me...

"Can you explain to this little girl the amount of pain you're in right now? Would you let her go through the amount of pain that you're experiencing, right now?"

Horrified, I answered, "Of course not!!"

The woman then put her hand on the girls shoulder, and I felt her hand on my shoulder. "So why are you doing it to yourself?"

I immediately got out of the shower, and dripping wet, took the pills.

There's a little girl that lives inside of me, and she's the culmination of me-of-days-gone-by. She wasn't treated properly when she was sick, and so I didn't learn properly how to treat myself when I was sick. I had to relearn all of that. So my best indication of whether or not I should allow myself to withstand something is if it makes sense to her. If she can understand it, and she understand good suffering---like suffering to get stronger, then it's okay. Once it no longer makes sense to her, I need to stop and think about what I'm doing. If I'm standing in a scalding shower, unable to do anything else, it's time to take the pain pills.

I do this for me, and everyone like me. Because I've had to figure this stuff out on my own, and these lessons came hard and at a high cost. People should know this stuff, so we can help heal one another.

So here's to you & me. Cheers!

"National Migraine Awareness Month is initiated by the National Headache Foundation. The Blogger's Challenge is initiated by"

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